Chris has always been a great employee-full of energy, happy, and a hard worker. But lately, Chris' coworkers have noticed that something is wrong. Chris
...needs a lot of help with work and asks coworkers to cover up for being late
...seems to make and receive a lot of personal calls
...avoids old friends in the office
...is always tired
A: The sudden appearance of unusual behavior may be a sign of an alcohol or other drug problem.
If it is, you will probably notice that the behavior is getting worse. Alcoholism and drug addiction are diseases that will get worse until they are treated or until the person dies. Alcoholism and other drug addiction affects the user's health, behavior, and life. Look at the stages: Do you see someone you know?
Stage 1 Casual or "experimental" use. The person gets high but no one thinks it is a problem. There may not be signs of use at this stage.
Stage 2 More frequent alcohol or other drug use. The person starts using more often-even during the week. Clues to look for: changes in friends, poor school or work performance, mood changes, and unexplained loss of memory, called "blackouts."
Stage 3 Preoccupied with getting high. Daily use is common for some users; others may "binge." The user is ill more often. Family and job problems get worse. The user may start to have trouble with law. Family and friends are concerned.
Stage 4 Compulsive use. Without the drug, the user may go into withdrawal, which can be life threatening. Illness, blackouts, and overdosing are more common. The family feels torn apart. Getting money to buy drugs becomes an obsession. The user is about to lose his or her job and is isolated from friends. Without treatment, insanity and/or death may follow.
If someone you know shows signs of alcohol or drug abuse, you may want to help. But you need to know how. The best way to help a user face an alcohol or other drug problem is to make sure you don't ignore or cover up behaviors or mistakes that result from the abuse or addiction. When you cover up for someone, it is called enabling.
After a while, you may feel angry because the user takes advantage of your patience and kindness. Some enablers are also codependent.
Codependent people are often raised in addicted families, which put them at high risk for developing their own addictions. A codependent person may be addicted to drugs, other people, work, sex, money, food, gambling... anything to try to ease the pain. If you are saying "not me," remember that people who enable and who are codependent are often in denial; they will not admit that there is a problem.
Confronting someone can be scary. Here are some common fears and some reassuring facts.
| FEAR | FACT |
| You don't know enough about addiction to say anything. | You can learn about abuse and addiction. Every bookstore and library has information on this topic. |
| You don't have the right to tell someone else how to live his or her life. | You do have the right to tell someone how his or her behavior is affecting you. |
| Your nagging causes the person to drink or use drugs even more, because it adds stress to the user's life. | You are not the cause of other people's behavior. Using is how the user chooses to handle stress; not using is also a choice. |
| You'll offend the person if you mention his or her drinking or drug use, or you are too embarrassed to talk about it. | You might offend the user when you say his or her drug use seems extreme...but your concern might also save the user's job, marriage, or life. |
| You know the user has a problem, but you don't know where the person can go for help. | Before you talk to the user, find out about available treatment. Call your local hospital, or look in the telephone book under "alcoholism," "substance abuse," or "rehabilitation." |
| If you say something you'll have to get involved. | If you ignore an addiction, it will only get worse. Addiction is a disease; if it remains untreated, it will kill the user. |
Remember that millions of people have been hurt by someone else's alcohol or other drug abuse. You are not alone. You can and should get help even if the user won't. There are lots of self-help groups for friends and family of alcohol and other drug abusers. These groups can show you new ways to respond to the user so you don't feel as hurt or scared. And maybe when the user sees the change in you, he or she may realize that it's time to make some changes too. A trained addictions counselor can help you arrange an intervention where friends and family confront the user and encourage him or her to seek help.
For Coworkers:
Don't let a drug-using coworker put your health, safety, or job in danger. If you suspect that someone is using alcohol or other drugs on the job or is coming to work high, don't help the user avoid facing the consequences of his or her behavior. If an impaired coworker threatens your safety, tell a supervisor right away. If you see a coworker get high or deal drugs on the job, report it to a supervisor as soon as you can. If your company has an employee assistance program (EAP), you may want to talk to an EAP counselor about how to handle the coworker's alcohol or other drug use.